Weekly Trash

Quest: Part One

dark souls 2.jpg

I have been gone these last few weeks. A quest, stretched before from the Gods themselves, has possessed my soul with no intent to relinquish control. I know not when I shall be free again. I am not sad. Or worried. This is, simply, my life now. A man on the road. In perilous pursuit of light, savaging used cadavers in the shadows, and battling fleshy monstrosities spawned of fire and blood.

Do not fear for me. I am immortal. I die over and over again only to come back to life and do it again. My foes, too, cannot die. Although my combat with them is very lethal we both ignore any consequence in the end of our time together.

Such a world seemed daunting at first. As I continued to live and die, I discovered the rapid progress I was making in improving myself. I may have been set on this course against my will, but as I continue to grow stronger I find it impossible to blame the Gods. No, I do not hate them, nor do I hate my seemingly endless quest.

I love it.

Dark Souls 2 Scholar of the First Sin

Drangleic. Yes, I have seen this land many times (360). This time, I am led by the Scholars of the First Sin (PS4). The journey is superior to the others in many ways. Everything looks nicer, and clearer, including the light which is much more dynamic this time around. My times teleporting between bonfires have been drastically reduced…from about thirty seconds to five. Most interestingly, my enemies have changed in both number and location, which changes each location of the world drastically. I’ll go in with a very clear image of what to expect, only to be met with something surprising. Surprise isn’t something I’ve experienced in Drangleic since my very first visit, so this Scholar-led journey is very much appreciated. Perhaps I seem like a lunatic, but I find myself smiling every time I feel the Pursuer lurking behind my back. In the past I would have to fight him twice. With the Scholars I’ve been made to best him five, maybe six times, and his arrival is always a welcome surprise.


Passage through Drangelic has always been possible through the possession of a vessel. I’ve possessed many throughout these rotten lands, but this current vessel may be my favorite.

Sexy Fashion

His name is Mountain Dew King. Strange name. Even stranger, is that he’s a woman. He slipped himself into the gender swap coffin willingly. Why? Well, Do the Dew and perhaps you’ll find out. Spoilers: It makes you want to experiment with some weird shit.

I fucking love greatswords in this game. My previous adventures lead me to adoring the Moonlight Greatsword, and while that one is still the most beautiful sword out of the Souls adventures, the Crypt Blacksword may be a strong contender. It’s moveset is that of a Greataxe, which means that I can attack enemies directly in front of me quicker. The regular Greatsword (which I’ve also been using and is fantastic) has longer and wider animations that are easier for other players to parry. I don’t really care, considering I’m not fighting other vessels unless they invade my world. Those wider attacks are best against groups of enemies. Especially with 40 strength and the weapon being plus 10, I can let my armor poise through enemy attacks and take out a room with one or two combos. Feels amazing to swing something so gigantic and powerful. The Crypt Blacksword is impressive because it has amazing damage potential, giving substantial physical damage and dark magic damage that scales off a vessel’s dark magic stat. Which is Intelligence and Faith, both requiring investment to even wield the weapon. It would be a great weapon to wield against foreign vessels, but for now it’s also a great weapon to use against undead enemies in my world.

I had a difficult time beginning this adventure again. My exact build took a while to get going, since I focused primarily on advancing my adaptability first. That’s the way of Dark Souls 2, however; adaptability is required if you want swift rolls. And if you want to chug that Mountain Dew Livewire quickly.


mt dew estus.png

I cannot hear Mountain Dew King’s thoughts, if he still has any what so ever, but as I take over his body I feel it’s necessary to reward him with what he requires. And I believe that’s Mountain Dew. SO CHUG THAT SHIT FASTER.

I also feel that Mountain Dew King’s needs beyond corn syrup. The man envisions a future that is lucrative and comfortable. So he took the offer to dive into the dark side by advertising Call of Duty Black Ops. I think what gave him this idea was the Crypt Blacksword. Investment was made to wield it, and further investment to wield strong dark magic was minimal. I aim to get dark magic weapon, allowing me to buff the Greatsword or Claymore if I want use them in place of the Crypt Sword. If I keep leveling this character, which I plan to as I need to complete the added worlds (DLC) before the next Souls adventure comes out (DSIII), then I plan to move on to upgrading health and endurance fully before pumping more into Intelligence and Faith. Being able to use resonant magic would be godlike.

There’s another world, though. My quest requires more than Drangleic can provide. Thus, I feel my soul ripped from one reality, and thrust into another quite different, yet completely similar. I’ll write about my adventures in Salt and Sanctuary very soon. So keep one eye open.

guts one eye



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